Here I go with a new project. [pushes up sleeves] I follow an incredibly talented photographer on flickr but somehow her blog has missed getting put on my reader list. [fixed that blunder] This is crazy because the few times I had gotten over to it, I loved it!! Well her photo today was linked to her blog where she announced her decision to participate in National Blog Posting Month. I immediately felt inspired, followed very quickly by fright and then regret that I found out about this project. Because for whatever reason that is still not clear to me, I have joined as well. I know this is going to be rough. I know I’m going to regret this decision many times before the month is up but I was mostly inspired by Dani’s other project of a month of gratitude and the idea of combining the two. Gratitude is the emotion I have felt since about 1:20 this afternoon.
I woke up this morning feeling a little groggy. I’m used to getting between 5 and 6 hours of sleep but with Daylight Saving Time ending and getting to sleep-in, I ended up getting an extra 3 hours of sleep, which left me feeling a little tired. Aaron, my insomniac husband, had actually gotten close to the same amount of sleep as I did. We laid in bed for awhile then he mentioned that I should stay home with Grayson who was coughing a lot more than the night before. I wasn’t thrilled at that, but my heart leapt at the thought that he was going to take the other kids. My husband has also become somewhat of an inactive worshiper. I’ve spent the last four weeks taking the kids to church alone. This has been an off-and-on issue for the past 13 of our 15 years together. I keep trudging my way to church where I WANT to be and I want my children to be but grudgingly because I wish my husband wanted to be there as well. So for whatever reason we were late and I grumpily took the kids yet again. We missed the Sacrament and testimonies. I did my job as bouncer in the 7 year old primary class, which wasn’t so hard because my 7yo was home with Dad. THEN I got to go to Relief Society. I love Relief Society, this is my weekly hour of recharging. I love the sisterhood we have, the opportunities to serve, lift and love one another. And every week I look forward to the heartfelt messages that sisters share.
This weeks message was based on Elder Bednar’s conference talk More Diligent and Concerned at Home. The lesson was wonderful. My grumpy, begrudging attitude melted away as I listened and felt the Holy Ghost bear witness of the truth of the words Aimee taught.
I truly love my husband, every single strength and weakness he has. I know that he is given his trials to overcome, even if they take all of this life. And I know that I have to overcome my trials, especially the ones that may stem from his. I am grateful for my marriage and all that I learn from it and all the growth I receive. I’m especially grateful for the good that Aaron brings out in me day after day. I could very easily be a different person if it weren’t for him.
I know that I just have to keep baring my testimony of the Gospel and of the church by taking our children to church and encouraging him to come with.
And I know that I have to try with all my might to be consistent with my patience and love because it’s my trial to overcome as well.
I m grateful for that hour of uplifting and love.